In an instant

On September 27, I lost a piece of my heart. My big brother died suddenly in a motorcycle accident.  In the weeks that followed, my tribe came around me and held me up. Cared for my son, washed my clothes and fulfilled commitments I could not.

I don’t know how I walked through these weeks, I hope with grace, patience and love on my lips.  I felt him whispering to me “stay strong sis” & “have a good cry, Stumpy” – his voice is in my head at night.

When asked how I am, I can only say “upright.”  My days are only marked by wet or dry days.  My grief is written on every moment of the day, I know it will lesson as scar tissue forms but for now, I can still see my pulse in the wound.

It is strange how old wounds open, with a new pain.  I have turned to my journals, my family, friends and inward as I work through these tough days.

I hope in the days and weeks to come to journal here about the journey of my season of grief.